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I went for my final two candidate's interviews yesterday. For those just tuning in, the process of discernment for ordination in the Diocese of Niagara (my diocese) involves an extensive application, assessment by the archdeacon and bishop, a series of three initial interviews with different interviewers, an intense weekend conference (ACPO), and three more interviews. Along with one's seminary/school of divinity, each of these devices has the authority to put the brakes on one's progress toward ordination. I'm relieved to say that the interviews went well. Actually, they went scary well. They both felt more like chatting with a friend than a grilling. I suppose that's evidence of good interviewing, that the people in question were able to hear what they needed to hear without being cruel about it. I left Hamilton feeling pretty good about my prospects, and about the character of the diocese. And now I find myself in a strange place. Here I am, almost graduated and with a clear and smooth path in front of me. I know where I'm going and I'm very content with the situation. Not all of my classmates are so fortunate. Of course it stands to reason that, in any formation process, there are people who hear "No". Sometimes the "No" ought to have come sooner than later, sometimes it ought not have come at all, and sometimes it's really just a "wait, work, pray and come back later" or "perhaps not this ministry, but have you considered this?" There are a lot of ways to serve God's church. Nevertheless I have friends who're not so sanguine about their futures. So when I have good news, it's not always easy to share. (I know, I know...we should all have such problems.) I'm already about as conspicuous as a student can get, as co-head and all, and by nature I'm not at all keen on bragging. As Cervantes has Don Quixote say, "It is my study to deserve and avoid applause." Perhaps modeling one's behaviour on Don Quixote is unwise, but there it is. In the end I sit on whatever news I have, except within the Three Musketeers (a.k.a., Harry, Ron and Hermione...I'm Hermione. Drat.), and only provide information as demanded. Coming from the family I do, not sharing everything that's happening at every moment and in every facet of my life with everyone in earshot feels a bit shady, as if I'm hiding something. And I guess I am. Oh, but it will out. Soon, the truth will out. |
